Human Error Pt. 2

"You're sure you got me signed up properly?" Julia asked, her hands running as far down her belly as she could go to help her balance as she waddled into the local YMCA.

"Of course, Calia and I got everything taken care of," Ruby said, coming in behind Julia since the two of them were too big to fit in the doorway.

"You two don't have a great track record when it comes to organization and my pregnancy," Julia said, nervously watching Calia bound over to the front desk.

"Hi! My friends and I are signed up for today's lamaze class," Calia said, leaning over to get the attention of the receptionist who was distracted by her computer.

"Okay, great," the receptionist said in a pleasantly disinterested tone as she lifted her head. "Just fill out our sign-in sheet and mark the OH MY GOD!"

The whole front desk jumped at the sight of Ruby and Julia's pregnant bellies and every eye within range was staring directly at them. Even as Calia was leaning against the desk and giving a generous view of her chest, the only thing people could focus on was those impossibly large round stomachs.

"I may have forgotten to mention one detail about us," Ruby said as she quickly filled out the sign-in sheet. "It's just down the hall?"

"Uh huh," the receptionist robotically nodded, her eyes still widened to the max. "O-on the left."

"Thank you!" Calia said with a sunny smile as she walked alongside Julia. While Ruby seemed darkly amused by the disruption her belly caused and Calia was her usual happy-go-lucky self, Julia kept feeling worse and worse. Her arms slid down her belly as far as she could stretch them in an attempt to cover her maternal bulk but they were too slender and her round stomach was too large. 

Just like at the coffee shop, Julia's self-consciousness started to set in. She felt like a misshapen freak and just wanted to hide her belly away, though the only thing nearby she could hide behind was Ruby. 

"You okay? You're slowing down," Ruby said, turning around and nearly knocking over a passing father and his small child in the process. "Are your legs falling asleep again?"

"No," Julia said with a sigh, catching up to her and Calia as they entered the gymnasium. "No, I'm fine." 

Inside, several mats were laid out in a circle with pregnant women and their partners sitting on them. On one of the mats, unaccompanied, was a woman dressed similarly to Calia (though not as voluptuous) with a pink headband keeping her long auburn hair in place. She had light brown skin and a stomach that was starting to become rounded, suggesting she was either about five months pregnant or she'd toned her abs in a very strange way. "Oh!" she exclaimed when she first saw the three of them walking to the circle, but she quickly tried to regain her composure. "I-I think the last members of today's class are here."

"Hi," Julia said meekly, waving her hand cautiously as she made her way to an empty mat in the circle. Before she sat down, knowing she'd have a hard time getting back up if she tried, she turned to Calia and Ruby. "Calia, are you going to be my partner?"

A flicker of panic spread across Calia's smiling face and she turned to Ruby. They whispered intensely to each other, talking too quickly and quietly for Julia to hear though she could make out the word "jealous" a few times. Calia turned back around, her caring grin still on. "Actually...it would probably be better if you find another woman here to be your partner. Besides, you'll get a chance to make some expectant friends."

Julia turned back to the circle as Calia ran her hands around Ruby's belly and gave her a playful tickle as Ruby stifled a laugh and swatted her away. "Sorry but would anyone here be willing to partner with me?"

The instructor looked around the circle where all of the women were already with someone. "You can be with me," she said, waving Julia over. "It'll be better to demonstrate with another woman anyway." Julia waddled over and slowly heaved herself down to the mat. "I'm Monica."

"Julia," she replied with a nervous handshake. "Thanks. I feel better having the instructor be my partner. I'm going to need all the help I can get." The other women laughed politely and Julia smiled a little, glad her joke went over well.

"Don't worry, everyone can use the class, whether they're a first-time mother or on baby #6 like Gina here," Monica said, motioning to one older woman who stroked her big belly with a smile. Well, she would have seen big to Julia before yesterday. She was clearly only carrying one baby, albeit for close to 40 weeks. "Now, let's start with some techniques to relax when we feel contractions hit." Monica moved behind Julia and put her hands on her back. "Now, everyone push lightly on your pregnant partner's back to help them lean forward. Moms, follow my lead with the breathing."

Julia groaned as she started to feel Monica's push. With her belly as big as it was, it couldn't go forward easily and rubbed against the mat on the floor. Not only that, but the shift in weight caused a strain on her hips and chest. "I...I can't go any farther."

"C'mon, just take a deep breath and stretch a little more. You'll feel much better," Monica said to her quietly.

"No, I mean...I can't," Julia said, her voice starting to shake. "I can't do any of this. I-"

"Shh, shh, it's alright," Monica said, rubbing her back slowly. "Just follow the rhythm of my breathing, okay?" Monica began taking in quick breaths while keeping her hand on Julia's back. After a few moments of hesitation, Julia mimicked her breathing and after about half a minute, she found herself far more relaxed. "Okay, and break." 

Julia leaned back up and gasped, her hands rubbing the sides of her belly and feeling her unborn children squirming around inside. "I...I got through it."

"Of course you did," Monica said, holding Julia's shoulders to turn her around. It didn't take Monica long to see that wasn't happening so she paced around to Julia's front, placing one hand on her belly. "You are much stronger than you think."

"Thanks," Julia said, her cheeks turning red as she looked down at her stomach. "This pregnancy has not been easy."

"I had a feeling," Monica laughed. "But you're certainly having a...unique experience and that's something to hold on to."

Julia smiled again and looked around the circle. The other pregnant participants were resting and glancing over at her. "I don't feel as...weird with these women staring at me," she said. "I feel less like a freak."

"We're all in this together. We know how it feels to be pregnant and we just want to share that experience, not mock others for it," Monica said. "And you're not a freak at all. You're going through an amazing adventure and you look gorgeous doing it."

"Yeah, real gorgeous," Julia scoffed, patting her stomach so it made a sound like a tight drum. "All the male hippos at the zoo are mailing me flowers as we speak."

"I'm serious. In fact, most pregnant woman would add an extra year onto their gestation if they could have your belly skin," Monica said, rubbing her hands in large circles on both hemispheres of Julia's round middle. "And you're clearly a very attractive woman. Pregnancy has even made your hair glow."

"It's dyed," Julia said, her face now getting really red. "I like to change it every few months...though now that I'm pregnant, I should hold off on that. Chemicals and all that." As her eyes continued to move around the circle, she saw Ruby and Calia, both stretching out far more than any of the other women could muster. They caught her eyes and Calia gave her a thumbs-up with an inquisitive look. Julia chuckled and gave her own thumbs-up, which made Calia squeal with delight.

"Okay, let's try another one of those stretches, this time for two minutes," Monica said to the group. "Afterwards, I will show you all some massage techniques."

And so the class went, with Julia getting a grasp on the lamaze and other pregnancy relaxation techniques more quickly than she anticipated. She learned ways to stretch so her legs and hips wouldn't feel as cramped, how to lessen the tightness of her belly, how to relax when labor finally comes, and most importantly, she got to meet all of the other pregnant women in the class. In between exercises, there was plenty of socializing and Julia found herself welcomed as part of the group.

"You should come with us on the weekend," Gina told Julia, stroking her own exposed pregnant belly as her husband packed up her things. "We all meet and chat. Besides, if you don't mind, we have a lot of questions for you."

"I've got some questions too," Julia chuckled, following Gina's lead in stroking her round stomach without hesitation. "Especially from someone who's been through this five times already."

"Actually, just four. I had twins the last time," Gina said. "Though I know that must not seem very impressive to you right now."

Julia laughed. "Well, you went through it again so it can't be that bad." She thanked and hugged the other women in the group as Ruby and Calia watched from the side, big smiles on their faces.

"Seems she's doing pretty well," Ruby said, standing as tall and proud as she could with her belly pulling her down. "This was a good idea."

"She may not even need us soon," Calia said. "Though...it would be nice to stick around. I like her."

"You like her?" Ruby said, turning to Calia with a thin black eyebrow raised.

Calia nudged her fat hip against Ruby's belly. "I don't like her, dummy! We're all friends, aren't we?"

Ruby turned back to Julia and saw the happiness in her face for the first time since they met. "Yeah, we're friends."

Back at Julia's apartment, Julia was still slightly giddy from her class, her hands traveling all across her belly. "That was amazing. I had no idea there was so much discomfort that I could cut down on."

"It helped that you had a good instructor," Calia said. Ruby, out of Julia's eyesight, stuck her tongue out at the passive jab. "But you feel less scared?"

"Oh, I still have a lot of fears," Julia said with a nervous laugh. "But it's less like I'm drowning in them now. I feel...confident. I'm even getting new ideas for drawings that are really exciting."

"See, we knew you could do it," Ruby smiled, waddling over to Calia. "Didn't we, Cally?"

"Sure did, Ru-Ru," Calia giggled, nuzzling her nose against Ruby's before kissing her on the lips. They just pecked at first, but then they each let out a small moan and began to kiss with more passion, letting their tongues wrap together. For a second, Calia was lifted off her feet as Ruby bent her hips back and let her belly carry Calia's small frame. When they broke, Ruby's gleaming red eyes were locked with Calia's deep blue eyes before slowly turning to see Julia sitting on the couch. She did not look happy.

"What...what's going on?" Julia said, motioning between the two of them. "You two are together?"

"Well...it's not that unusual for people in the same office to date, is it?" Ruby said slowly, her mind racing to get to damage control.

"You two have been acting weird these past days," Julia said, her breathing getting heavier. "You've been in a relationship this entire time, haven't you?" Then Julia stopped, her pointing hand starting to tremble. "When we first met, you said this happened to me because you got distracted. Was your distraction..."

"Now, Ju-Ju, don't get upset," Calia said in her sing-song voice, moving slowly toward Julia.

"Don't call me that stupid pet name," Julia scowled. "I can't believe this. You two ruin my life because you couldn't stop from fucking one another."

"And now we're trying to help," Ruby said, her voice getting louder.

"You're doing damage control. And at the end, what's going to happen? I'll still have all these babies to take care of on my own." Julia could feel her skin getting redder and her heart race. "You're just doing this so you don't get in trouble at your job. You told me as much when we met."

"But that was before we got to know you," Calia said, placing her hand on Julia's bare belly. 

"Let go of me," Julia snapped, twisting her hips back and forth to shake Calia free. With a shaky push, Julia worked her way off of the couch and took a few stumbling, waddling steps to the middle of her living room before turning back and staring at both of them. "You two barge into my house, bicker and insult me, use up what little food I have, and in the middle of it all, you tell me 'Oh, by the way, we screwed up and got you more pregnant than any woman in history. Oops, sorry.'"

"Not the most pregnant," Ruby muttered, crossing her arms and looking away. "Not that you would know."

"We just want to help," Calia said in a small voice, her blue eyes getting bigger and bigger.

"I don't want your help," Julia said, putting one hand on the front of her belly and pointing at her door with the other. "I want you both out of here. And don't worry: I won't report you or whatever you're afraid of. Not that I'd know how."

Ruby looked over at Calia and saw her lower lip start to tremble. "Fine, if that's what you want," Ruby shrugged, pushing herself up and jutting her belly out. "C'mon Cally."

"But she can't-"

"Sure she can. Women have been doing this without any hands-on help from people like us for millennia. And she's a tough cookie," Ruby said, her eyes meeting Julia's. "Right?"

Julia didn't say anything, but after a few seconds of eye contact, her gaze dropped back down to her belly as Ruby walked out the door. Julia was watching her massive round stomach twitch and pulsate as her fetuses moved and bumped against her womb walls when a pair of large breasts in a tight sports bra blocked her view. Calia hugged her tightly, tickling the back of Julia's neck with her long brown ponytail. "If you ever need anything, just give us a call."

Julia mumbled a reply that even she couldn't make out. Calia walked back out the door with Ruby and, once she was out of ear range of Julia, began to sob. Ruby sighed and put one arm around Calia's shoulders. "What's the matter, Cally?"

Calia was crying like a little kid, choking on her tears. "We *guh* couldn't *guh* help *guh* her!"

"She didn't give us a chance to help. Besides, the important thing is she won't report us and we can keep these jobs," Ruby said, wiping away some of Calia's tears. "Isn't that the important thing?"

Calia sniffled and thought in silence for a few steps. "Ru-Ru...are we bad at our jobs?"

Ruby mulled it over in her head. "Look, no one's giving us an 'Agent of the Year' award anytime soon but we do okay."

"Maybe we should be agents in...different departments," Calia said. "This isn't the first mistake we've made, after all."

As quickly as she could, Ruby turned to Calia, her bare belly pressing against Calia's hips. "No. We have to keep these jobs." The intensity in Ruby's face began to die down as she grasped Calia's hands. "I don't want to lose you again." Another stream of tears started to flow from Calia's eyes as she swept Ruby up in her arms and the two kissed. Their hands ran up and down their backs and Ruby felt Calia's ponytail run across her palm.

"Okay," Calia nodded when they broke their passionate kiss. "We'll just work harder from now on."

"We'll figure something out," Ruby said. "Now let's get out of here. Your top's getting awfully wet and you know how jealous I get when other people stare."

---

Normally, Julia looked forward to her days off from the coffee shop. She could nap whenever she wanted, she could have some time to relax and recharge, she could focus more time on her drawing, and most importantly, she wasn't waiting on impatient and rude customers. But now, home alone, Julia was far from happy. She moved from room to room, struggling to find a comfortable position to sit like a cat pawing at a cushion. Each step was heavy and sore as she lugged around her massive pregnant stomach. Her balance was more disturbed than it had been the previous day and Julia kept hitting her hips on door frames or nudging her belly against a hard surface.

Anywhere she tried to sit, Julia felt her pregnancy unnerve her. It already felt much tighter today than it did before and sitting into her sofa or bed too deeply stretched her tummy skin even more and added to the pinching pain. But sitting too lightly in any seat put all the weight of Julia's gigantic belly on her joints which was just as uncomfortable. Julia tried to shift her body in various ways to fit in her seats but her fullness kept unsettling her stomach and set her unborn children into a tantrum inside her womb, which made it hard for her to focus on much of anything.

Even if Julia didn't have the discomfort of her pregnant body to contend with, it was hard for her to get any work done anyway. Because of the sheer size of her swollen belly, which she figured she could practically curl up inside, working on her laptop was near impossible. When she set it down, it was too far away for her to reach, let alone read the screen accurately. And when she rested it on top of her firm stomach, she could only work for 15 minutes at a time before it got too hot for her skin to bear. She could sit it on the edge of her bed and watch videos if she put them into fullscreen but Julia was not in the mood and if she tried to watch Netflix (using a friend of college's account she'd always said she'd stop using soon), it only led to Julia feeling more annoyed.

Trying to focus on her illustrations was just as fruitless. Before leaving the lamaze class, Julia found herself brimming with ideas. Now, whenever she sat or lay down to start working on it, not only could she not get into a conducive posture, but every idea felt stupid within a few minutes of starting. Julia would begin with her loose outline, then erase it and start over, repeat that several times, then when she settled on a rough outline and began to add details, abandoned the drawing altogether, finding it ridiculous. 

That was due in part to every idea she had involving pregnancy in a major way. At her class, surrounded by all the nice women who were willing to help her talk through early motherhood and opening her up to the beauty of her own pregnancy, these drawings felt like the truest expressions of her mood. Now, Julia wanting nothing more than to wake up and have the last two days be a horrible nightmare. From having sex at that party to finding her belly to feeling all the kicking to meeting Ruby and Calia.

Julia groaned and tossed her drawing pad to the side at the thought of those two. She'd gone for more than two years without so much as a kiss when she stumbled, literally, into the worst sexual decision of her life and meanwhile Ruby and Calia jeopardized her future by being too frisky with one another. Julia figured there must be a cruel irony in there somewhere but didn't have the patience to sort it out. 

There was another groan but this one didn't come from Julia's mouth. It came from her belly. Lamaze had taken a lot of energy out of her and Julia had been moping around her apartment for hours now so she was feeling awfully hungry. With a grunt, Julia heaved herself into the kitchen and looked through her fridge. To her surprise, it was far more stocked than she last remembered. There were big bags of fruits and vegetables, many of which Julia didn't even recognize. She pulled out one large, spiky...something and looked it over with a perplexed face. Next to where it lay in the fridge was a pink sticky note, filled out in frilly writing. "FOR JU-JU'S SULFUR BALANCE — VOLATILES, JOURNAL OF AGRI-FOOD CHEMISTRY " 

"Safe bet that Ruby didn't write this," Julia said, chuckling a bit before stopping herself and putting it back. Between the unfamiliar food and the massive, round obstruction sticking out from her abdomen, Julia decided to just call for Chinese take-out instead of cooking. When she eventually got her food, she only let the door open a crack so the delivery boy couldn't see just how monstrously maternal she was.

"Lucky you called when you did," the delivery boy said as he handed her the bag of food through the gap, "There's a big storm coming and we're stopping deliveries for the night."

"Drive back safe, then," Julia said, forcing a smile as she waved him away. From the couch, she could hear the wind starting to blow outside, getting stronger and stronger. Guess I'm not going anywhere tonight either. Not that I want to be seen outside with this thing any more than I have to.

As she ate, she thought about why yesterday seemed more eventful by comparison. She also just lazed around her apartment, occasionally working on her drawings, but it wasn't as dull. Then she remembered: when she was resting on the couch, Ruby took the time to show her how to position herself and ways to lessen the muscle pain carrying a heavy belly entailed. And Calia had cooked for her and was constantly brightening up the room with her sunny personality. It was like she had two roommates who were there to give her a hand when she needed it and just happened to be experts on the one thing she needed the most help with.

Right on cue, the kicking in her belly started up again, making her whole round stomach quiver and disturbing her smooth skin with small mounds where their feet and fists hit. Julia ran her hands all over her gigantic middle, cooing in a soft voice. "I'm sorry, I'm doing my best to take care of all of you while you're inside here. But I don't think I can do it on my own." Julia's breathing kept getting faster as she felt her eyes start to water. "I'm so sorry...I need their help. Ruby, Calia, I need your help."

Julia kept crying onto her belly when she felt a pair of arms wrap around her. She opened her wet eyes to see Calia hugging her on the couch, tears streaming down her big cheeks too. Looking up, Ruby was standing in the living room, smiling proudly despite her own eyes starting to mist up. "I thought you might," Ruby chuckled.

"Don't listen to her. She's just as happy to hear you called as I am," Calia said, giving Julia's shoulders another strong squeeze.

"You're both here," Julia said quietly, looking between them.

"We never really left," Calia said, rubbing her eyes as she moved beside Ruby, holding her closely and resting her head against Ruby's arm. They were both dressed in extravagant dresses, with straps around their necks keeping their backs bare while clinging close to their bodies. Ruby managed to keep her belly covered in her pearl white dress with plenty of room for her legs while Calia had just as much cleavage exposed as usual in her royal violet dress.  "We kept an eye on you, waiting to see when we could help."

Julia started to sob again. "I don't believe it...I-I've never had friends who helped me this much, who had my back when I needed them."

"You do now," Ruby said, running her hand all around her belly. "We're your friends, aren't we Cally?"

"Of course!" Calia exclaimed, giggling and jumping up and down. "But we haven't been very good friends lately. We didn't tell you the truth when we met and we want to correct that now."

Julia clutched the side of her belly and looked up at both of them. "That's great, but actually–"

"Calia and I have been dating on-and-off for centuries now, always splitting up for stupid reasons," Ruby said, running one hand down the side of Calia's waist to her generous hips. "But this time, we had a long talk and we want to stay together."

"I mean, you know us. Have you ever met two people who were so perfectly made for one another?" Calia cooed, looking over Ruby with heavy eyelids.

Julia let out a little groan. "Right, I appreciate your honesty, but right now–"

"We want the full experience. And when I finally give birth, we'll be parents together too," Ruby smiled, nuzzling her nose against Calia's. 

Just before they kissed, they hesitated, locking eyes, and turned back to Julia. "But see...with the way we are, there aren't many jobs available to us and the hours people like us work are pretty crazy. Working as partners in dealing with people's pregnancies is the only way we could really be together," Calia said. 

"That's why it was so important that you not report us. If we lose this current partnership...that's it for us," Ruby said, her voice starting to waver. Just before she started to tear up, Calia turned her back and locked lips with her. The two women moaned and bent back and forth, sharing a passionate kiss that felt right out of a romance movie. 

When they finally broke their kiss, their eyes were still closed as Calia held Ruby tightly. "But we want to work harder so we never make any mistakes again. Especially since we ending up hurting someone as wonderful as you, Julia. We just ask that you forgive us."

"Yeah, I forgive you," Julia said quickly, "Now–"

But Calia cut her off with a loud squeal, diving to the couch and hugging Julia's belly. "You're such a go~od friend, Ju-Ju, I mean, Julia!" 

"C-Calia, don't hug my belly!" Julia finally exclaimed.

Calia was still nuzzling her chipmunk cheeks against Julia's roundness. "Mmm, why?"

"I think I know why," Ruby said. Calia turned to see Ruby pointing at a wet spot near Julia's lap.

"Oh. Oh! Oh, oh!" Calia said over and over again, pacing around the living room quickly.

"You need to relax," Ruby said, gripping her shoulders to keep her still. "Delivering babies is your department. I just know how to carry 'em."

"Right, right, what to do," Calia said, her teeth chattering. "Okay, first things first, Julia, let's get you to your feet."

"Can't I just do it all here?" Julia said with a grunt, pressing both hands into her belly, feeling her muscles tightening up.

"Maybe, if it comes to that," Calia said, reaching her arms down to grasp Julia's. "But it's not an ideal position. I'd rather have you standing or crouching."

Ruby moved closer, helping Julia to her feet. "See, contrary to the way your doctors prefer to have women on their backs, the Journal of–"

"I'll just take your word for it!" Julia shouted, groaning when she finally stood up. "But I'd rather get to the hospital now." At that moment, the door opened up and a man and a woman, both in trim tuxedos, looked around. They could hear the wind from the storm blowing loudly outside.

"Oh, funny running into two of you!" the woman said. She had shining dark brown skin, bright red lipstick, and a shaved head. Her companion had the same complexion, minus the lipstick. Both seemed to be in good spirits, despite the tempest behind them.

"Great, just what we need," Ruby sighed. "People from the Luck department."

"Wait, wait, it may not be so bad," Calia said.

"Afraid it is," the man said, shrugging and giving a mock panicked expression. "We came by to drop off some bad luck to this apartment." He and his partner paused and cocked their heads to look at Julia, swaying in Calia's arms. "Probably for her."

"This isn't really the time," Ruby said, narrowing her eyes at them.

"Then another job well done!" the woman said, shaking her partner's hand. "By the way, don't forget about the inner-agency picnic next month. Everyone needs to pick what they're bringing. Can't have all these people bring Pepsi and no one remembered to bring dip."

"Bad luck..." Julia muttered to herself. "I guess I should be used to that."

"Hey, I thought she looked familiar!" the man said. "Anyway, have a nice night, folks." With that, they closed the door behind them and a crack of thunder rang throughout the apartment.

"So...good news and bad news," Ruby said as she rubbed Julia's back. "Bad news, there's no way you'll be able to get around with the storm outside. Good news, you can't be in better hands than Calia here." Julia let out a furious scream as another contraction hit her and Ruby backed away. "You know, I'll just let you two work alone for now. I'll see if I can get anyone to come and help."

---

"Is this helping?" Calia said in her gentlest voice as she held Julia's arm.

"A little," Julia whimpered, her other arm cradling her belly from below. Calia had her undress to just a t-shirt and was walking Julia slowly around the room. Close to an hour had passed and the apartment was totally dark as the storm knocked out the electricity. Ruby found a few candles and flashlights and positioned them strategically to illuminate as much of the living room as she could. All the towels in Julia's home were laid out in a stack on the floor as Julia paced around. "How much longer?"

"You're close to being fully dilated but you're not quite there yet," Calia said, wiping some sweaty strands of hair from Julia's forehead. "But don't worry, you're doing great so far."

"I'm not doing anything," Julia panted. "How can you tell if I'm doing great or not?"

Calia opened her mouth but thought before speaking. "You're not panicking."

"Trust me, I'm panicking," Julia said, her voice trailing off into a moan as her knees started to buckle, but Calia kept her steady.

"Oof, she looks bad," a new voice said. Julia turned one eye up to see a woman standing in the middle of her living room. She was wearing a small, loose white crop top and tattered jeans. Julia could only make out slivers of her bone-white skin because nearly every inch was covered in tattoos. Even the sides of her head were shaved to make way for more tattoos, leading to her hair being a spiky red mohawk. Additionally, her ears, nose, lips, and belly button were filled with as many piercings as could fit. When she talked, Julia could also see several studs and rings in her tongue.

"Finally, you made it," Ruby said, hurrying over and giving the woman a light pat on the back.

"She's who you called?" Calia said, looking the most upset Julia had seen her the whole weekend. Which wasn't much, but still, she clearly looked unnerved.

"Believe me, she was at the end of my list, but no one else was available," Ruby said, shrugging. "Julia, this is Nina, an old friend."

"Old girlfriend," Calia added.

"H-hey," Julia panted, reaching for Calia's hands to give them a strong grip.

"Nina works in Pain," Ruby said.

"Pain and Pleasure," Nina cackled. "So you want this all off the record?"

"If you could," Ruby said as Nina walked around Julia, studying her with her emerald eyes. "The less people know about her, the better."

"Shame, childbirth is one of the more colorful experiences in the world," Nina said, her eyes lighting up. "It can be up there with the bullet ant, in Schmidt's 'Hemolytic activities of–'"

"Nina, we're in kind of a hurry here," Calia said, helping Julia to sway her hips back and forth.

"Right, right," Nina smiled, turning to Ruby. "But you know, I can't approve an orgasmic birth off the record."

"You want me to what?" Julia exclaimed, looking up at Ruby.

"Not looking for anything fancy like that," Ruby said, waving her hands at Nina. "Just reduce as much of the pain as you can. For old time's sake."

Nina's smile grew as she looked over the three of them. "For old time's sake," she said, snapping her fingers. Immediately, Julia let out a long sigh and her legs looked far less tense. "There, that should do it. It won't be a walk in the park but in my book, humans don't appreciate pain enough anyway."

"Thank you," Ruby said, hugging Nina as best she could. "Seriously, thank you."

"Y-yeah, this feels way better," Julia said. "Thanks."

Calia sucked on her teeth before speaking up. "Yes, thank you Nina."

"We should have lunch, the three of us sometime," Nina snickered. "Anyway, I'll let you all get back to...whatever this is."

As Nina vanished, Calia checked up on Julia. "Perfect timing. Julia, you're going to need to push."

"H-how?" Julia said, feeling her belly tighten up again as Calia put a towel under her.

"How? You just...you know, push," Calia said. "It's intuitive."

"I-I'll give it a shot," Julia said with a grimace, tightening all her muscles to one end and wondering how much worse this would feel if Ruby hadn't called in a favor.

"There you go," Calia said, massaging the sides of Julia's belly. "Use the breathing you learned earlier today."

"Good thing we didn't put that lamaze class off until tomorrow," Ruby remarked to herself, watching Julia with great focus as she ran her hands over her own belly.

"Looks like one last big push, Julia," Calia said, yelling over the sound of Julia's own loud groaning. With a deep breath, Julia crouched deeply and pushed hard until the room started to fill with the sound of a baby crying. A minute later, it was out onto the towel and Ruby was struggling to pick it up and wrap it in a towel.

"There, there little guy," she said in a cooing voice, bouncing the baby boy on her shoulder, its umbilical cord still attached. "You're a handsome little fella. You must take after your momma."

Julia was mixing laughs with moans as she saw Ruby holding her baby. "H-holy shit," she muttered. "I just gave birth."

"Not done yet," Calia said, patting Julia on the shoulder. "That belly is big for a reason."

"How many more?" Julia grunted, feeling her body continue to tighten up.

"Let me double check," Ruby said, pulling out her phone with her free hand and scrolling through. "Hmm...probably better you don't know right now."

---

In the end, Julia was resting on the couch, a blanket wrapped around her and a cold press on her forehead as Ruby and Calia had all of her babies swaddled and sleeping on a soft surface. "The weather's still pretty bad," Ruby said, peering out the window. "But you shouldn't need an ambulance any time soon." 

"We both made sure you and the babies were totally healthy when we realized our, um, mistake," Calia said, holding one of Julia's baby girls against her abundant chest.

"That's a relief," Julia said weakly, exhausted from her long delivery. One hand rested on her midsection, now a little pudgy but nowhere near as big as she'd been a few hours ago. "But listen...I wanted to run an idea by the two of you."

"Sure, what's up?" Ruby asked, waddling over with Calia joining her. Julia kept trying to open her mouth to talk but stopped and tears would well up in her eyes. "What?"

"I...need to do what's best for these kids, right?" Julia said slowly.

"Well...yeah," Calia said, looking at Ruby with a confused expression. "I don't think anyone's disputing that."

"And living with me would not be what's best for them," Julia sighed. "I'm on a coffee shop waitress's wage, I'm single, and I'm in a cramped little apartment. I can't raise more than a dozen babies."

"We'll be here," Calia said, giving a big, reassuring smile.

"But you can't be here forever," Julia said, reaching one hand up to give her sleeping baby girl a light back rub with her knuckle. "But you two...you said you wanted a family."

Calia and Ruby's faces both went blank with shock and they looked at each other frantically. "Um...that's...um..."

"I can't think of anyone else who'd be better parents to them," Julia smiled, one tear rolling down her cheek. "And you're going to need experience for when Ruby gives birth. Real world experience, not just scientific research on child-rearing."

Calia looked at Ruby and was even more shocked when she saw her lover start to tremble and her cheeks get red. "We'd...we'd be so honored to adopt your children," Ruby said, starting to cry. "W-what do you think, Cally?"

Of course, Calia instantly began to weep. "I think it's a great idea, Ru-Ru!"

"But is that a problem? You raising human children?" Julia said.

"No problem at all. We all started off as humans at one point," Ruby said, taking the baby girl from Calia and resting her on her shoulder. "Just a little bit of paperwork and they'll be just like us."

"Well, hopefully they're not all like us," Calia giggled. "I'd hate for too many of them to be weighed down like I am."

"But could I...visit every now and then?" Julia said, her bottom lip starting to tremble. "I mean, I only carried them for less than two days so it's not as hard to separate from them as it might be but...y'know...I still love them."

"You can visit whenever you want," Ruby said with a tearful laugh, kissing the baby on the forehead. 

"If...if we're doing this, we'd better take them as soon as we can," Calia said, sniffling. "While it's not too hard to get the 'human' off of them."

Ruby turned back to Julia and smiled. "This has been...a real adventure, hasn't it?"

"Sure has," Julia nodded, smiling back. "See you both soon."

"We'll check in on you, don't worry," Calia said, bending back down to give Julia a big hug. "Thank you for...for being you."

Julia laughed and wiped her eyes. When she opened them again, everyone was gone. Ruby, Calia, all the babies. "Guess that's it," Julia said with a sigh. She was still not in great shape to stand up from the couch, but luckily, she was right in arm's reach for her notepad and ideas were starting to come back to her.

Back in Ruby and Calia's home, Ruby was waddling into their bedroom after laying the babies down in some temporary cribs. "I've ordered some new ones," Ruby said, undoing her dress in the back. "Good thing they ship in bulk." As she started to drop her dress, she saw Calia look a little uneasy. "What's wrong?"

"No, nothing's wrong," Calia said, biting her lip as she smiled. "It's just...that was really unexpected."

"I'll say," Ruby chuckled, sitting down next to Calia, kissing her on the cheek, but Calia wasn't being her usual amorous self. "Seriously, what's wrong?"

"No, like I said, nothing is wrong...per say," Calia said, turning back to Ruby, still with her weird grin. "It's just...I'd been under the impression that it would be a long time before we had any babies of our own."

"Yeah, that's how it goes," Ruby said, patting her belly. "So you wanted to wait longer to have kids?"

"No...the opposite, actually," Calia said, her face turning red. "Remember when you thought my breasts were getting bigger?"

"Ssssorta?" Ruby said, thinking back to the night that led to the mix-up with Julia.

"Well~ it wasn't just your imagination," Calia said, wiggling back and forth on the bed. "See, I kinda went to a sperm bank on a whim and...I was planning on surprising you on your anniversary of joining the department next week."

Ruby's red eyes were wide open. "You...you mean..."

Calia took Ruby's hand and placed it against her own flat stomach. "Looks like you'll still be sharing a house with a pregnant woman, Ru-Ru."